


Phan one-shots

by SarahHowell_Lester



Category: Phandom, Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-06-25
Updated: 2014-06-28
Packaged: 2018-02-06 05:46:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,864
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1846609
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SarahHowell_Lester/pseuds/SarahHowell_Lester
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An ongoing and growing collection of Phan one-shots. (((Trigger Warning: Some may contain Self-harm, Sexual Abuse, Drug and Alcohol Abuse, Rape, Domestic Violence, & Major Swearing.)))</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Bent and Broken

It wasn't everyday that I got a break. Today was one of those days though. I walked through the halls, getting stares as I went. I sped up and tried to ignore them, knowing I was being judged here and there. I finally got to my locker without talking to anybody, or getting interrupted, which wasn't really normal. I looked carefully over my shoulder trying to see if one of 'them'  was heading toward me, ready to unleash their wrath. Luckily, nobody was even around me. I got my books and headed toward my next class, which was History. The classroom was a long way down the corridor, so it takes longer. Everybody was rushing past me, not acknowledging that I was there, getting run over by the people behind me. I didn't make it to class on time. I was still a ways down the hall. "Shit.." I muttered to myself, knowing that if I was late, I would be sent straight to the office. I decided not to try to rush anymore, I was already late, it wouldn't matter. I walked a few more steps and saw a boy laying on the ground with three people around him. I quickly hid behind a trashcan, observing from a distance. I squinted my eyes to see if I could get a better look. I recognized the three guys that towered over the boy on the ground. It was the school bullies. I gasped, only loud enough that I could hear. I ducked behind it, and listened to what was going on.

"You not strong enough little pussy?" One of 'them' asked. I heard a moan in response.  
"I guess he isn't. Maybe we should give him some more so he can learn how to stand up for himself." One of the others said.  
"N-no. Please... Just leave me alone..." The boy managed to breathe out.  
"Why should we? Just because you're hurt already? Or is it because you don't deserve it?" The leader said, "Don't even think about that. You do deserve this, you gay little shit!" Then I heard a thump and a moan. I wanted to do something. I really did. But I was too scared for myself to have the courage to do so. I looked back up, seeing them laughing at the broken body that lay on the ground.  
"Help..." I heard the boy say.  
"You think someone's going to hear you? Even if they did, they wouldn't help you." The leader said and the other two laughed. That was it, I had to do something. After all, how many times have I been in that situation, wishing somebody would help me? I got up and walked toward the scene.  
"Leave him alone!" I yelled as I approached them, regretting as I did so. All three of them turned around. Two of them coming toward me. I backed up a little, showing I didn't want to fight.  
"What's wrong Howell?" He said to me, "Don't want us to hurt your boyfriend over here?" He started coming towards me like the other two.  
"Don't hurt him, he's done nothing wrong." I said, a little more confident. Hoping, praying that they'd just leave. But I knew that was never going to happen. They didn't even say anything else. They just lunged toward me. I dodged them, not touching any of them. Then, I was on the other side, where the boy was laying.  
"Keep them.. a-away.. Please.." They boy moaned out. I crouched down next to him, "I will, don't worry. You'll be okay." I said, looking at the others.  
"You want to be a hero and win his love, don't you?" One of them said and laughed. "I think he does. I think we should give his little boy crush here more just because of him." The other one said. The two jumped me, holding my hands behind my back, not letting me move. The leader grabbed the boy by the arm making him scream a little. He held him up by the arm and punched him in the stomach. Tears started forming in my eyes. I knew I shouldn't have gotten involved, I just made it worse for the boy. He doused over in pain, holding his stomach from the punch, trying to ease the pain. The boy was crying at this point, and I was about to. All of them just laughed at his pain, making me want to kill them. No one should deserve this. No one deserves this. I started to get angry and tried to break loose but I failed. They were just too strong. The leader walked over to the nearest set of lockers and threw the boy into them, making him pass out. I was crying at this point. One tear right after another. I realized that maybe helping was a bad choice. I had just made it worse for him, and now he's unconscious, and it's all my fault.  
"Let him go." The leader said. They threw me on the ground making me moan.  
"Better luck next time, faggot." One of the others said and walked off, kicking me as they went by.

What did I just do? I made a fool out of myself(not like I already wasn't one anyways). I crawled over to the boy. He was laying on his stomach. I turned him over. His face was bruised, scratched and cuts went along his arms, and he probably had some broken ribs or an ankle. I slid as close to the lockers as I could, letting myself up. I had a limp in my walk, but it was nothing near as bad as him. I walked over to him. I had to him out of here. I knew the nurses here didn't give a shit, and neither did the teachers or other staff. I sighed and picked up his limp body. My arm under his legs and my other arm supporting his back. I limped down the hall, noticing the clock. There was only 20 minutes of that class left. I had to get out of there, quick.

I made it down the hall in just 5 minutes, and out the double glass doors, hoping nobody saw me. I walked to my car and placed the boy in the passenger seat and then I slid into the drivers side. I started it up and headed toward my house. I got there in 10 minutes exactly, hopping out and making my way over to the other side of the car. I got him out, carrying him as I did before. I walked into the building, dreading the three flights of stairs I had to limp up. When I got on the third floor I sat him down, back against the wall. I dug out my keys and opened the door, picking him back up and walking inside. I managed to close the door with my butt and then I walked into the living room and sat him down on the couch. My parents weren't home so I had nothing to worry about right now. I speed walked into the kitchen, swearing at myself because of my leg. I got an ice pack ready and went back to where the boy was at. I gently laid it on his forehead, carefully not to startle him if he woke up. I sat in the floor beside the couch, watching him. I had just realized that I've never seen this boy at school before, so he was new. But that isn't the only thing I noticed. I studied his face, trying to figure out what I found attractive about him. I gave up and just accepted that he was really cute. I had just got up as he started to wake up. His eyes opened and he shot up, fear in his eyes.

"W-where am I?" He asked, looking around the room.  
"You're in my house. You were hurt really badly and I knew no one at school was going to help so I just brought you here." I said. He looked at me with a blank expression. I sat down beside him, "I know you're probably in shock, it's happened to me before. But you probably need to rest." I said. He didn't say anything. I started to say something else but he cut me off,  
"T-thank you, for you know, s-saving me back there." He said.  
"No problem. You looked like you needed help. And I couldn't stand to see you get hurt like that." I said, looking at the floor.  
"I could have handled it on my own. I-I'm used to it." He said.  
"I had to help you. You wanted help, I could see it in your eyes. Do you know how many times I wish there was help there when I was laying on the floor crying and getting the shit beaten out of me?" I said.  
"I-I can probably guess." He said. There was an awkward silence. I didn't know what else to say. Then it came to me.  
"If you don't mind me asking, what's your name? I haven't seen you around." I said. He hesitated. "Oh come one. You can trust me. I'm not like them," I said. He looked up at me for a moment, our eyes connecting. He had the most striking blue eyes ever.  
"P-Phil. I'm new. I just started t-today." He said.  
"That explains why I haven't seen you." I said, looking back down at the ground.  
"What's your n-name?" He asked.  
"Dan." I said, not taking my eyes off of the floor. Then I remembered.  
"We probably need to get you cleaned up." I said. He looked at his arms and nodded, "Yeah. Do you have a first-aid kit?"  
"I think. Uhh, let me go look." I said and got up and walked into the kitchen, still limping. I looked in all the cabinets to find one. I was small, but it would work. I walked back into the living area where Phil sat.  
"Do you want me to.. Or can you..?" I asked. He looked up at me. Our eyes met again, staying there for a few moments before I realized his arms again and I looked down.  
"Oh... Umm, I don't know. They hurt pretty bad..." He said.  
"Okay.. I'll do it then." I said. He sat the ice pack down and gave me his left arm. It was horrible. Cuts everywhere. I shouldn't have, but I had to ask..  
"D-do you c-cut?" I asked, now regretting my decision. I looked up at him, noticing tears forming in his eyes.  
"I-I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked.." I said, cleaning up his arm and bandaging it and moving onto the next one, doing the same routine. As I finished I looked back up at him and then looking back down.  
"Y-yes." He said. I was shocked. I looked into his eyes seeing tears fall down his cheeks. I wiped them away with my thumb, now I'm about to cry.  
"There's no r-reason to be ashamed of that." I said, still looking into his blue eyes, "I-I do too.." I said and rolled up my hoodie sleeve to reveal several cuts that were out of order, up and down, side to side, vertical. "It's the same on the other one, too." I said, tears now falling down my cheeks. I looked down. I felt his hand cup around my cheek, making me look up at him. He wiped my tears away, as what I did with him. I stood up, picking up the first-aid kit and limping back to the kitchen.  
"You're limping." He said. I stopped and turned around.  
"Yeah, they kind of, hurt my leg a little. But it's fine, I've had worse." I said. Laying the kit on the counter. I walked back over to Phil and sat beside him, putting my head in my hands. He put his hand on my shoulder. I looked up as his eyes met mine once again.  
"You know you're really beautiful right?" I said, blushing a little. He didn't say anything. I smacked myself mentally for saying that. I closed my eyes, wishing I had never said that. But then all of a sudden, his lips met mine. I tangled my hand through his hair, pulling him deeper into the kiss. He pulled back, looking me in the eyes. He smiled and I was probably blushing like an idiot but I didn't care.  
"Hey Dan." He said.  
"Yeah?" I said.  
"Will you be my boyfriend?" He asked. My eyes lit up.  
"Yes." I said, kissing him again.


	2. Be My Escape

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one-shot is based on the song 'Be My Escape' by Relient K.. Never done one of these, so it might be crappy.

_**I'm giving up on giving up slowly** _

_**I'm blending in so you won't even know me** _

_**Apart from this whole world that shares my fate...** _

 

I was walking along the pavement, book in hand, heading to my favorite spot to read: atop on the hill, where it's breezy and open. I couldn't read anywhere else, if I tried I wouldn't be able to concentrate. I got on up where it got grassy and there were trees here and there. The perfect reading spot. I was the only one who actually was up here the whole day, although, there's this one guy, he stays most of the day. Sometimes, I glance up from my book to see him staring at me, then when I'd look up, he turned his head. I thought it was just a coincidence the first few times but it's been an everyday thing after that. I moved to different spots a couple times, but it still happened. It didn't bother me much, mostly because I was bi and this guy was pretty good looking. 

One day, I got up there and he wasn't there. The clouds were settling in and was probably about to rain. I shrugged it off, thinking I had about 30 minutes before it started to pour. I got sat down, my back against a tree and I opened my book. I was currently reading the book Beautiful Creatures. I thought it would be too romantic, but it was actually pretty good. I read a few pages when the wind grew stronger; a sign that it was about to storm. I kept reading until I felt a few drops of water cling to my face. I knew it was time to go back and get inside but I was so oblivious to what was actually happening, and I couldn't stop reading. The wind grew stronger and stronger, but it didn't pull me out of my gaze at the book, it was so interesting. Then it started to thunder; making the ground shake as well as me. I looked up, finally, noticing the deep dark clouds gathering above me. I quickly got up and stuffed the book into my jacket, not wanting it to get wet. Then I saw something out of the corner of my eye...

 

**_This one last bullet you mention_ **

**_Is my one last shot at redemption_ **

**_Because I know to live you must give your life away..._ **

 

It was the boy that I saw everyday. He was shouting something but I couldn't hear him over the thunder and the rain now starting to pour. I was still standing next to the tree, and now he was running toward me. I didn't know what he wanted, so I just stood there, waiting. His shouting was louder now that he was closer but it was muffled. He pointed up wanting me to see something. And there it was; a funnel cloud. "God Dammit!" I shouted, not knowing what else to do. The boy finally got to where I was. He was covered in rain, and breathing heavily.

"You.. Need... To... Come.. Now!" He said after every breath. He grabbed my arm and ran. I was running behind him, not having a choice. I looked back to see the funnel had touched the ground, headed right toward us. "Holy crap!" I shouted, making him turn around. His eyes got wide but he turned around and kept running, while dragging me behind him. I glanced back a couple times to see that it was getting even closer. "We're not gonna make it!" I yelled, then I saw something come into my vision. It was a storm shelter. I sighed of relief, and then I glanced back one more time, it was even closer now. I turned back to the front. "Duck!" The boy yelled and I did so. 

 

**_And I've been housing all this doubt and insecurity_ **

**_And I've been locked inside that house all the while you hold the key_ **

**_And I've been dying to get out and that might be the death of me..._ **

 

I saw complete darkness. What had happened? Was I dead? Did we get sucked into the tornado? Where am I? 

"Are you okay?" I heard a voice ask.

"Y-yeah.. I think so." I said. Then a light flicked on. The boy was standing there. His chestnut hair falling over his face, dripping with water. "W-what happened?" I asked.

"I just saved your ass. That's what happened." He said, chuckling, walking over to me, "We'll probably have to stay here a while. They said it would last hmm.. maybe an hour or so. I couldn't hear it real well." He said. All I could do was stare at him. He had saved my life.. Sort of. Plus, he was beautiful. 

"Okay.." I said, my voice trailing off, "What are we supposed to do while we wait..?"

"Something to keep us occupied, obviously. Don't you have a book?" He asked. Crap. My book. I unzipped my jacket and pulled it out, "I don't think I'll be able to read this anymore.." He laughed. My book was soaking wet, "So much for trying to keep it dry.." I said and giggled, "Now what am I supposed to do?" I sat down on the concrete floor, crossing my legs. He sat down beside me.

 

**_And even though there's no way in knowing_ **

**_where to go, I promise I'm going because..._ **

 

"How 'bout we get to know each other?" He said, looking up at me. His eyes were a deep hazel/brown. Almost like his hair.

"Sure." I said, "You go."

"Well. My name's Dan, I've lived here my whole life, and my parents hate me." He said, "Now you." His parents hate him?

"Uhh.. My name's Phil, I just moved here, and uh- I love Muse." I said.

"Cool. I love Muse too. I also love My Chemical Romance." He said.

"Famous Last Words is my favorite song." I said, "And I love reading. As though, you probably knew that already." I said, laughing a little.

"Haha, yeah." He said, "I spend most of my time in here, just listening to music. Sometimes I won't come out for days."

"Really? Why's that?" I asked.

"To get away from my parents." He said and sighed, "They literally just hate me. They sometimes even throw a few punches and some kicks here and there." His voice cracked. I didn't say anything, I just looked at him. "They scream at me and yell. And sometimes I just can't take it." I truly felt sorry for him.

"I'm sorry." I said, whispering a little.

"N-no. You don't have to be sorry. It's my fault anyways. I guess I deserve it." He said.

"Why would you deserve something like that?" I asked.

"Because I'm gay. And they're homophobic." He said, looking into my eyes.

 

**_I gotta get outta here_ **

**_I'm stuck inside this rut I fell into by mistake_ **

**_I gotta get outta here_ **

**_And I'm begging you, I'm begging you, I'm begging you..._ **

 

"Just because you're gay doesn't mean you deserve it," I said, "They need to just accept it and move on. That's what my parents did." I said, not breaking eye contact.

"Y-your parents did?" He said, "Are you gay too?"

"Well.. Sorta.. I'm- uh, bi." I said.

"Oh. Well that's not as bad. At least you kinda like the opposite gender." He said. I couldn't help but stare at him. He sounded helpless and alone, probably thinking no one would accept him.

"That isn't the point." I said, "I'm saying that they just need to suck it up. They shouldn't judge their own child because he's different." He was still locked onto my eyes, "You know, you're the only one that's ever said that to me."

"Really?" I asked, shocked. "Yeah. Everybody else also thinks I'm a freak." He said.

"You're not a freak. You're human, everyone's different in their own ways. People should just be able to accept it. It's not your fault." I said.

"Yeah. I'm human. Humans make mistakes, and I think I've made a huge one." Dan said. Just then, I heard some rumbling above us and looked up. The storm still wasn't over.

"You haven't made a mistake, Dan. You are who you are. And there are people out there who accept you." I said, looking back down.

"Like who?" He asked, sadness in his voice.

"Like me." I said, "I accept you and I just met you. That must say something." He didn't say anything and looked at the floor. It stayed silent about five minutes and I couldn't take it anymore, "What else should I know about you?" I asked. He didn't say anything. I sighed, "Look. I know you feel bad about this, people have made me want to cry myself to sleep at night. Sometimes I even want to kill myself. But I don't. I don't because I know there's someone out there that cares. I know there's a whole lot more out there than what we're seeing. That's what keeps me alive." He looked up at me, surprised. I can't believe I just said that.

"Y-you've wanted to kill yourself?" He asked. I nodded, "Uh.." I scratched the back of my neck, "Yeah.."

 

_**To be my escape.** _

 

"I-I think the storms over.. Uh, you can go home.." He said.

"I don't want to go." I said, "Oh, and I didn't say I've  _tried_ to kill myself. I've just wanted to."

"I know..." He said.

"Look. I'm just gonna come right out and say it." I said, and he looked back up at me, "Uh.. I-I really like you.. Like.. A lot.." His eyes widened, shocked at what I said, "Y-you do?" He asked.

"Y-yea-Yeah, I do." I said and looked down. 

"You've only known me for an hour." He said, "And how could you like me? I'm a freak."

"You're not a freak."

 

**_I'm giving up on doing this alone now_ **

**_'Cause I've failed and I'm ready to be shown now_ **

**_He's told me the way and I'm trying to get there..._ **

 

"I am. Don't even try to tell me different." He said. My mouth hung open, "I'm trying to tell you different! I'm trying to get you to see something here!" I yelled, furious, "There are people out there that will accept you and like you! You're not a freak and you're perfect! Even though I've only known you a fucking hour, I already know you're amazing and beautiful!" The was a couple seconds of silence. "Y-you really mean that?" He asked. "Yes! I do, and you should be happy. You don't deserve to be screamed at by your family just because you're different." I said, calming down a bit, "You shouldn't have to go home to that. I can see why you stay down here all the time."

"Y-yeah. I-I realize that now.. And P-Phil?" He said.

"Yeah?" I replied.

"I-I like you a lot too." He said.

 

**_And this life sentence that I'm serving_ **

**_I admit that I'm every bit deserving_ **

**_But the beauty of grace is that it makes life not fair..._ **

 

"Good." I said smiling, "Now I can do this." I leaned over and kissed him. I could feel him smile halfway into it. I pulled away, smiling.

"T-that was nice.." He said. "See, I told you." I said. He laughed. Everything was forgotten from that last conversation. We were both happy now. Smiling like idiots.

"And I still don't want to leave." I said, "I wanna stay here with you."

"Don't you want to see how your family is? They're probably worried about you." He said.

"Ah, that can wait 'til later." I said.

"Are you sure? I'll come with you." He offered.

"Nah. I think they're fine. Quit worrying about it so much." I said.

"Okay. Okay." He said and laughed, "We can stay here a little longer."

"Yay!" I said.

 

**_'Cause I've been housing all this doubt and insecurity_ **

**_And I've been locked inside that house all the while you hold the key_ **

**_And I've been dying to get out and that might be the death of me..._ **

 

"Got a question." He said.

"Shoot it." I said.

"Does this mean we're uh.. dating?" He asked. I thought for a moment before answering,

"Uh, yeah. Yeah, I think it does." I said. He smiled, "Good. Now  _I_ can do  _this_." He said and kissed me again. More passionately. I grabbed his waist and pulled him closer to me. I think I could get used to this.

 

**_I've gotta get outta here_ **

**_I'm stuck inside this rut that I fell into by mistake_ **

**_I've gotta get outta here_ **

**_And I'm begging you, I'm begging you, I'm begging you..._ **

**_To be my escape._ **

 

And with that, we started talking and laughing. Not caring about anybody else at the moment. 

I'm glad he kept staring at me while I was reading. I'm glad I just stood there, not knowing what to do. I'm glad he pulled me in here. If none of that had happened, I wouldn't be the happiest person on the planet right now, with the best boyfriend  _ **ever.**_ _  
_

 

_**And all I was trying to do** _

_**Was save my own skin,** _

_**But so were you...** _

_**So were you.** _

 

 


	3. I Love You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's based on the song 'I Love You 5' by NeverShoutNever.
> 
> P.s. I'm quite fond of these song ones. I'll probably do a whole lot more :)

**_I love you one.. A two... A three shoo-bee-doo_ **

**_I love you four, that's more than I can afford_ **

**_And I can tell someday that I'm gonna say the truth..._ **

 

I was watching Phil sleep. Is that weird? I mean I didn't intend to do it, it just happened, it happens sometimes... Actually, it happens every night.

We're stuck inside this crappy apartment with only ONE bedroom.

We managed to fit two beds in here, two desks and computers, two dressers and so on...

Our beds were right across from each other, that's the only way they'd fit.

Well, back to the story...

I was watching Phil sleep(not creepily, I'm not a pedophile!) and I had noticed something, and I don't know why.

I thought back to the times Phil and I had together. The memories from many holidays together, and making videos with each other. But... This one night, I scared myself, but in a good way.. If that makes sense.

I've noticed I do this a lot, watching him sleep. I just have a feeling I have to watch over him so he doesn't get hurt. Like I'm his protector if a serial killer decided to come in and shoot us. Oh, and by the way, if that did happen to happen, I would take a bullet for Phil any day.

You see what I mean? What I've realized? Well, if you haven't caught on already, I'm just going to put it out there.

I love Phil.

 

**_I love you 5..._ **

 

And no, not in a best mate way. In a "I-want-to-be-your-boyfriend" way. Like, I've never thought about him in that way before, but... I've known ever since I met him. I can feel it.

Yes, Phil is amazing in all sorts of ways, but he's so much more. He means so much more to me than anybody else, even my own mother for fucks sake.

And I realized this just by staring at him.

Now isn't that weird?

 

**_I've been walkin' around tryin' to figure out_ **

**_Why I'm feeling all these feelings that I'm feeling now_ **

**_And I've got more on my mind, than I've got on my plate_ **

**_*Cought cough*_ **

 

*/ The next morning I was eating a bowl of Coco Pops in our crappy kitchen. Shouldn't even be called a kitchen. I was the first one up, which was weird. Then, I heard footsteps down the hall. Phil was up.

He walked in, hair a mess, just in a shirt and boxers.

"Morning..." He mumbled. "Morning." I said back, stuffing my face with cereal, not knowing what to say next.

"Anything goof besides cereal?" He asked, scratching the back of his head.

"Not that I know of, we've got bananas." I said and smiled. "Ew. No. You know I hate bananas." He said and opened the fridge door, staring into it before closing it.

"Find anything interesting?" I asked. "No. But I found a sock.." He said. I looked up to find him holding a sock he had just pulled out of the fridge. I started to laugh, knowing it wasn't my sock.

"Don't laugh at me. I was desperately wanting to go to sleep but I probably did some things before I did..." He said, his voice trailing off. "I hope to find more surprises." I said and chuckled.

 

\---------------

 

*/ I've always liked Dan. Not as a best friend either. Something more.

Something a lot more.

I knew he didn't feel the same way. I didn't even think I was gay. Then we got to know each other and it just kind of... Hit me. Like a bullet to the chest. I try not to make anything awkward, knowing that if I show any lust for Dan, he'd go batshit crazy.

But I love Dan. In a relationship kind of way  _and_ in a best friend kind of way.

I know that we're more intimate or more "touchy-feely" than most friends are.

But we aren't just friends.

We were best mates.

But I wanted something more.

 

**_I love you one.. A two... A three shoo-bee-doo_ **

**_I love you four, that's more than I can afford_ **

**_And I can tell someday that I'm gonna say the truth..._ **

 

*/ "Dan." I said, getting up from the leathery couch. "Yeah?" He replied. I hesitated for a moment.

"I need to talk to you." I said. A look came across his face. Not a face of disgust. But worriedness. He was worried of what I wanted to talk about. I would be too, if I didn't know my friend had feelings for me.

 

\---------------

 

I got up and walked to where Phil was at. I got worried. He could probably have seen it on my face. I wondered what this was going to be about. There's a million things that he could want to talk about. I guess I'll have to find out.

"What is it?" I ask as I followed him into the kitchen. He stopped in his tracks. "Nevermind..." He said and faced me. He tried to walk past me, but I stopped him. "No, what was it? It seemed important." I said.

"N-no. It's nothing. It's stupid." He said. "No. It is something." I said, "Please tell me." I looked into his bright blue eyes. 

"O-okay." He said. He stood back in front of me again fumbling with his hands. "Well, I wanted to talk... About... Us..." He said. 

_What?_

"U-us?" I asked. Now concerned. What was he going to say?

"Yeah.. Us.." He said. "What about  _us_?" I asked.

"Okay. This is really hard for me... But I'm just gonna come out and say it..." He said. There was a moment of silence.

"U-uh... I'm gay.." He said. My mouth dropped, but he couldn't see. When he looked up I acted like it was nothing. "Cool." I said.

"Cool?" He said. "Yeah. Cool." I said.

"Don't you get it?" He said, "I'm gay, and do think there was small chance that I could have fallen in love with you at some point?" My eyes met his.

"It happens with people sometimes." I said, feeling completely embarrassed. Should I say that I love him too?

"No. It doesn't." He said. "I knew this was a bad idea, now I've probably screwed up our friendship." He said and shook his head. He started to walk off. I felt so bad, I didn't know what to do.

"Phil." I breathed. "Wait."

"What is it?" He asked. Turning around.

"I know you think you've screwed this up. But you haven't." I said, looking into his eyes. "Our friendship isn't over. It could never be. I don't see it... But, I-I want to tell you it made things better, actually." I said, feeling my face burn red.

"W-what do you mean?" He asked, walking back over towards me.

"I'm saying..." I said, hesitated, "Will you go out with me?" His face turned white like he'd just seen a ghost.

"You don't have to do this." He said, "I know you're only doing this for my sake."

"No. I'm not." I said, "I-I feel the same way."

"You're not gay." He said.

"Dammit Phil!" I yelled, "Why won't you just accept it?"

"Because I  _know_ you don't feel the same way." He said, "You never act like it. You've never... I don't know.." I looked down at the floor.

That hurt like hell.

 

**_I love you five times more than any boyfriend before_ **

**_'Cause all they really cared about was whether you put out_ **

**_And I truly believe_ **

**_That this love could be_ **

 

"Like I said, you're not gay." He said, "Obviously."

"I may not be gay.." I said, "But I'm gay for you." I choked on that last sentence. He stood there in silence, turning pale again.

"Phil-" I said, "I love you."

 

**_And I could count five times off the top of my head where I sucked it in_ **

**_'Cause you were hangin' with him_ **

**_And I've got something to say,_ **

**_I love you all the same_ **

 

"D-Dan..?" He said, "Do you really mean that?" There were tears in his eyes.

"Yes. I do. I've been in love with you since we met." I said, "And it just  _kills_ me not to have you."

 

**_I love you one.. A two... A three shoo-bee-doo_ **

**_I love you four, that's more than I can afford_ **

**_And I can tell someday that I'm gonna say the truth..._ **

 

He just stood there in shock. I walked over to him and put my lips on his. I grabbed his waist and pulled him closer, more into the kiss. His hand was running through my hair. I didn't want to move, I just wanted to embrace him forever. He pulled away to catch his breath. I rested my forehead on his. 

"Do you believe me now?" I asked, smiling.

"Y-Yeah. I do." He smiled back.

"You never answered my question." I said, "Will you go out with me?"

"Yes." He breathed. I kissed him again, this time longer. I finally had him.

He was finally mine, and mine only.

Nothing could ever tear us apart.

"I love you." I breathed.

"I love you too." He said.

 

**_I love you 5._ **

 


End file.
